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Written by Administrator
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Saturday, 07 July 2007 09:54 |
 - “If This Person Is So Great, Why Are They With Me?” -
There is the “Groucho Marx syndrome” the belief that goes, if someone wants to be with me then they cannot be that wonderful. There are time when we meet someone who is really wonderful and beautiful and they are all of the traits we say we want in a partner. Things are wonderful for a time, there is joy and happiness and fun and then the Groucho Marx syndrome sets in. The thought come along that they cannot possibly be as wonderful as we thought they were or they would not be with us. Clearly we do not deserve someone so wonderful as this person in our lives. So if they don’t leave, we begin to tear them down both verbally and mentally. We want them to be with us because they are so wonderful, and yet if they were really that wonderful they could not possibly want to be with us. So there is open warfare to drive them away. And just when we have beaten them down in our minds to the point where they are “good enough for us” they leave. They leave because they can no longer take the abuse. Then there is the realization that we really want to be with them. So what do we do. We spend the rest of our lives attempting to get them back or looking for someone who is just like them. Or reminds us of them and we usually are never fulfilled. © Copyright 2009 Heartsight Therapy |
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Last Updated on Sunday, 18 January 2009 18:00 |
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THE INNER CHILD SEES CONFLICT AS A WAY TO RECEIVE ATTENTION. The inner child wants to be acknowledged for everything that he or she has any contact with. The inner child wants praise, needs praise to feel good about themselves. When a person does something that is praiseworthy the inner child wants to be sure that everyone knows who was the person responsible. The inner child feels so much need for notice that he or she will do anything to get that notice. It is important for the inner child to be acknowledged and praised and put in the limelight. When and if the inner child does something for someone she or he wants to be sure that there is acknowledgment of that action, and they want that acknowledgment frequently.
There is also the blame game, where the inner child is made responsible for any inappropriate behaviors that exist. It has become almost a fad, the in thing to do. © Copyright 2009 Heartsight Therapy |
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Imagine if you will a therapy that is based on what is “right” with the client. The purpose of that therapy would be to focus on what is working and to increase that, which is working, in your life and in the life of those around you. Is that a novel concept?